Awhile ago I did a progress report on how I felt and how I have arrived at a place I called at the time Bliss..although I now know I hadn't quite reached it when I wrote this, I do know now that I am here.......... It is often thought that in the best of times, we are in bliss … and in the worst of times, well, life is simply a living hell. I’d like to discuss this point. ( I wrote this as though I was talking to my self) What if even in the worst of times one can experience an unusual sort of bliss? That is what this particular moment has called for from me as I adjust to losing my 25 year-old-son, Miles. As many of you know, he died suddenly 5 months ago from an accident at home. And I am now in the sort of transition one would usually call a tragedy or even a crisis. Yet, in the heart of this, what I am experiencing more and more is a remarkable sense of peace. I have, of course, been radically changed by this experience, as have Miles’ father, Trevor, and his sister, Kate and also Drew Kate's partner (now her husband). And yes, we are grieving, sometimes together and sometimes alone. What is happening more and more for me, personally, is an emergence, a blinking into an entirely new light. This is a place that is beyond explanation, control, or even comprehension, really. It is truly a field of bliss – and it continues on and on, expanding when I allow it, to fill my heart just a little more every day. So what am I so blissful about, one might ask, now I can never see, speak to, hold or even talk to my beloved son again? Now I can never listen to him speak to me on the phone, perhaps talking with determination or frustration, or possibly excitedly reporting his latest win or a new song recording he has made? How in God’s name can I be blissful of all things? I can only think this mysterious bliss completely transcends such small concerns. It is a state of being which is liquid, potent and it transports me instantly – so I literally transcend my circumstances when I let go of the suffering and grief I feel and could so easily subscribe to, so I allow myself instead- to surrender to it. Our logical minds want so badly to make sense of this old world. How we want to figure our path through uncertainty, imagining untold conversations and envisaging outcomes. And yet … there is no certainty to be had, ever, under any circumstances. All of that is truly just illusion, make believe, we are kidding ourselves because we feel at the time it suits us. An illusion must be dashed in order to know this extraordinary bliss. Believe me, I did not sign up for this experience willingly – nor did I resist it unwillingly. I just went with it, from the minute I got the news that he had gone, there was nothing I could do to change that, then, I knew I had no choice … even when the paramedics and my loved ones were telling me, there was nothing anyone could of done, death had been instant, and that he wouldn’t have suffered. Really, there are only two ways to respond to anything that troubles you in life – accept it, surrender and go with it … or resist. And to resist that his packed and powerful 25 years was all that our son Miles would have, is to simply miss the point. He was not unfortunate to have died so young. He was extremely fortunate to have had a life at all … and certainly to be born with a character so willing, so caring, so giving, so free, and so committed to living and to joy. Miles’ life truly was brilliant and shining. And so his death is not a tragedy but a reminder to us all to live just a little more each day. To honestly treasure the minutes we have, for real – not just with some polite PC lip service. But to really, truly get in there, to embrace your lives fully, yes to live them to the full and in your truth. That means eradicating all that is not true for you and aligned for you – the situations, relationships, agreements the bad ideas you’ve got yourself into, get cracking with the good ones and make something of them. And not next week or next year or when you have more money or time, but now. Now! For indeed this is the only time we have Ask yourself where you have held yourself back from joy? What are you resisting that must simply be owned, and ultimately honoured? This is where the bliss is, it transcends all. It is a rightness that you simply know in your body in your soul; it is you talking to you. And it is nothing less than your soul informing you of what must shift, right here and right now, so you can truly surrender to joy. Why not, I ask? All that you will gain is - happiness, no matter what you must stop resisting. And no matter how much pain you must endure to begin the letting go. This is the true path back to peace and happiness, and now the choice is yours. Will you surrender to the bliss that awaits you and really start to live, to make the most of every second and to really find your bliss? With love, light and sparkles Karen